My point is once you are divorced and have to do this thing called "co parenting" (which I think is a total SHIT word... just sayin') lines can easily be crossed. In my situation it is anything but 50/50. Hell for the last 8 months my ex-husband was too busy playing daddy and husband to his girlfriend that my children didn't matter. I guess I'll be fair I totally had a restraining order on him but for good reasons. However once you become a parent you are still responsible for caring for them in any way that you can. Am I right or am I right? When I first left my ex I couldn't find work in my field. I ended up taking a part time job at a day care that paid only once a month. Mike and I split all the bills down the middle and I have 2 children to support. Every month when I got my ever depressing paycheck I would be left with a total of .79 cents to last me an entire month. Im not exaggerating. I thank God everyday for Mike because he stepped up in so many ways, he will always be my hero. I haven't received child support in almost a year. Throughout that year my kids had wants, their needs were taken care of, but like all children they had wants. It broke my heart to always be the one to say no. Every time they asked me for something I had to say no. I didnt have the money, hell I didnt have enough gas in my car to take them to the park. I was struggling to keep my head above water but we were making it and that's got to count for something.
February shit got real. He went to jail and all kinds of stuff happened, and he very well could be returning to jail this month. I caved, like the
I still haven't made my point. I'm long winded at times. Now that he is getting the kids 2 days a week for a few hours. Every time they come home with something new. I don't know why but it pisses me off. Why do you get to pretty much buy their love and affection and be super dad all of a sudden and Im just the mean ass mom that says no all the time and disciplines them. I know my kids love me dont get me wrong but it hurts to be the bad guy all the time. He gives them whatever they want and since he only gets them a few hours a week he doesn't have to enforce any discipline.
I tried to talk to him about it last night. I told him I was sick of being the bad guy all the time and it wasn't fair that he bought them whatever they wished for. His response... "If I have the money and they want it why not?" Maybe I am being too sensitive maybe I'm getting all butthurt over nothing but it makes me angry.
He says well I give you child support.
They are 2 and 7 they don't understand those things. What they do understand is ooohhh shiny new things that my daddy buys me when Im with him. Meanwhile mom is in groucholand and says no all the time and makes me do stupid stuff like taking a bath and doing my homework and cleaning my room and then punishing me when I act like little assholes in public.So I mean if you are 2 and 7 clearly the winner is going to be daddy with all his buy me stuff abilities.
I know its not a competition between us and again I know my kids love me but quite frankly im sure they dont like me quite a bit. I know in the long run they will understand but damn it sometimes I want to be the cool mom.